How are you?

As someone who had struggled deeply with depression and now risen from it, one pattern I have come to discover is the overcompensation emotionally and this can drain you or even lead to burnout.

For people like me who find it very easy to give to others, you can get hung up on the unmet expectations of reciprocity, where you expect for some reason that because you give and show up for others that they would do the same for you.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with receiving but it is not dependent on you, meaning it is out of your control.

So, this is an encouragement and a validating word that you are seen, felt and heard.

The truth also is this, that when you put yourself in a state, sometimes, people will draw from you and take from you till your blood drops to a zero, is this normal, no it absolutely is not.

But more than the people, it's usually a show of something going on within you too, a missing link, you have not yet come into, a place of regulation.

There is such a thing as emotional regulation. Whenever I find myself cringing at things that I genuinely love, I now know I have hit a space red and I need to pay attention and refill. Because if you do not learn to self regulate, the very same things that you easily give and gift to others, you won't know when it begins to turn into resentment.

This is me checking in to ask you, how are you really?

Are you gradually tuning out because you expect that perhaps someone will know?

God knows and this is how I know that he cares deeply about us, about You.

So, again, how are you really?